Monday, October 31, 2005

From Padmé's Blog: Return to Tatooine

We arrived on this hot, dry, dusty, nasty planet and located Watto, the Toydarian who once owned Anakin and his mother, Shmi Skywalker. He directed us to the Lars homestead where we met Owen, who I guess is like Anakin’s step-brother, and his girlfriend Beru. Owen kept looking at me all creepy like, but Anakin didn’t notice because he was all like consumed with “where’s my mother” and all.


Sunday, October 30, 2005

From General Grievous' blog: The Mess of the Republic

I had a splitting headache last night, this morning it had disappeared as fast as it had come. I travelled to work where a group of press were waiting to take pictures for Coruscant Daily News. So into my office I went and was followed by about 5 photographers. When the pictures had been taken and I had given them answers to the questions they didn't ask, I waited to see what they had written.

30 minutes latter my secretary walked in and placed the paper in front of me. On the front page was a huge picture of me.


Thursday, October 27, 2005

From Captain Typho's Blog - Naboo: “Irresponsible Journalism”

Where: Kaadara, Naboo.

Feeling: Tired.

Listening to: Holonet News.

I am able to find an animal hospital in the Deeja Park district with round the clock staffing. Peko is still alive when I get there, but she has not regained consciousness.

I give the vet the bitten up tube of hand lotion from the spa. I explain that this is what the dog ate and I ask her to have it analyzed. The vet assures me that I can go home and she’ll call me with any updates on the dog’s condition, but I decide to stay. That irritates the staff, but I don’t care. I ask them to turn on the holonet screen as I sit back for a long stay in the waiting room.

I watch the news to distract myself, but instead I see yet another thing that disturbs me.

Buried among the stories is one about an intercepted transmission supposedly revealing that a secret conference of sector leaders is meeting at an undisclosed location in the Core. Some of the leaders rumored to be attending the conference have Separatist leanings, so the fact that they’re attending a conference with representatives from solidly Republic worlds means they may be having second thoughts about their alliance.

My first thought is that this is the worst kind of irresponsible journalism. If the conference is for real and it is secret, it ought to stay that way. My second thought is that if it’s false, the reporters do more harm than good by getting people to believe in a fairy tale where wars are averted because people actually sit down and listen to reason.

The reporters show a series of shots of suspected locations for the conference, followed by shots of twelve of the representatives thought to be in attendance.

Something clicks in my head.

I grimly realize that I’ve seen three of those faces -- and recently.


Wednesday, October 26, 2005

From Survivor Tatooine : Qui-Gon's "Yours and Mine"

The cave only held two figures, as opposed to the group that once dwelt there. The two mulled around, picking through the remains of the camp. There was a smouldering ring, where the nightly fire kept the team-mates warm and the predators away. In nearly every corner, there were small spots that resembled nests, light beds consisting of scraps of cloth and dewback hide. The cooling bot hummed from the back corner of the cave, with the small hamster wheel inside squeaking. The big screen holo-vid and the Toshy XXL-Box(R) were off. There were beer cans running up the side of one wall next to an etching of 'Ben was here.' Around the cans, there was an orange haze coating the floor. A single tarnished credit glimmered faintly in the setting suns of Tatooine shining through the entrance.
The spectre, Qui-Gon Jinn, floated around, head hanging low. His face was long and he sighed often.
Read more.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

From Yoda's Blog: Shop She Can But Cook She Can Not

Invited Kenobi, Young Harvey the Padawan, and me to her apartment for dinner, Senator Amidala had. Unfortunately, to cook dinner herself, she decided. Saying that bad her cooking is, I am not. But once, a CARE package filled with cookies she baked herself, she sent to some starving refugees. Sent back to her the package was, along with a threatening letter signed by the refugees.

Read more here you can.

Monday, October 24, 2005

From Palpatine's Blog: An unexpected visitor (Part II)

“Be a good droid and hang this up in the guest room, if you would please,” he motioned to the droid, passing it his top hat, cloak, and cane. “I say, old chap, have you got anything to drink around here?”


“Lord Tyrannus…what are you doing here?” I reply in my low, gravely voice.
Continues here...

Saturday, October 22, 2005

From Padmé's Blog: Corruption

OK, I’ve got to vent today! I am appalled at how the republic controls the media. I was catching up on some news and saw this story. Apparently the Republic’s education department paid a writer to promote their agenda. Seriously, since I’ve become a Senator – since I was Queen, really – I’ve become more and more disillusioned with the Republic. The corruption is rampant.

Anankin and I were talking about this just this afternoon.


Friday, October 21, 2005

From General Grievous' blog: Party at Palpatine's

Last week I held an awesome party in Palpatine's office. Here's a group picture: Quite a few people turned up, some on false pretences (I couldn't give away my location to some people in case they told their Army):
Anakin Skywalker
Jawa Juice
Mace Windu
Padme Amidala
Jar Jar Binks
Qui-Gon Jinn


Wednesday, October 19, 2005

From Jar Jar's Blog - "Note to Self: Read Footnotes"

Okeyday... mesa class goin well today... up to a point. Usen' mesa cunning potion, mesa performen berry well. Mesa doin everyting with muy muy dexterity and grace. Den... der potion's effects wearen off. And mesa becomen even more clumsy than usual...

Clicken here to continuen yousa readen.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

From Captain Typho's Blog - "Haven't you heard the news?"

Where: At the federal building in Kaadara, Naboo.

Feeling: Nothing.

Listening to: A droid question me about how I lost my ID.

I hate droids.

And it’s not just because my planet was once overrun by their murdering hordes. Droids always seem to get in my way when I’m already pissed off about something.

After leaving the ship at the starport, I took one of the onboard speeders to the federal building to get replacements for the IDs and job-related I lost when I was pick pocketed on Ansion. This sort of thing can be done remotely, of course, but I wanted to expedite the process.

Did it go smoothly? No, of course not. The droid wasn’t satisfied with my explanation of how and where I lost government property. It also wanted to know why I hadn’t filed a police report on Ansion. I didn’t have a good answer for that one.

Anyway, I answered what I could and submitted the forms. I had to pay some fines.

I’ll probably have to go through something similar on Coruscant to report the loss of the various tags and IDs I use on a daily basis in the Senate building and 500 Republica.

That is, of course, if I go back to Coruscant at all.

I’m seriously thinking of handing in my letter of resignation. I’m tired of this life.


Monday, October 17, 2005

From Qui-Gon's Blog : Braving the Mall

We needed some, like, new clothes. Me and JJ were without our swingin' bachelor pad and the majority of our stuff was covered in an orange haze after spending time at Obi-Wan's. So we went to the best place to get overcharged for shoddy merchandise, the Coruscant Western-Northern Mall.
It was Go'Oorchuk's Day, so there were all these crazy sales. Nothing draws Jawa to a mall like sales. And, like, they weren't even good sales. It was like in the adverts "45% off Scratch and Melted Candles at Quark's Magic Wax Barn," "Save an additional 10% of 1 and 3/4 % of 15% on already discounted fashions by Snarvf at Snoots for Snivvians," and "Free Toothpick at Posh'n'Co with purchase of Dilithium Crystal jewellery (starting at only 2000 credits!)."
With the sales, the parking was crazy. We had this nice one, like, out front, but some jerk in this really posh BMW cruiser pulled in. JJ showed him what he though of him with one finger, and I caught the plates. 'PALPS.' Negative vibe merchant. We had to park in section QQQ4.
Read More.

Sunday, October 16, 2005

From Survivor Tatooine - Yoda: The Contemplatively Candid Confessional

Stand these doofuses anymore I can not. Too much the drama is. Even sleep anymore I can not because of the stupid arguments they have. The other night, having this argument they were.

"Easy, there, Farm Boy," Solo said to Young Starbucker, "I'm just sayin' it has to be Jessica's fault for her break-up with Nick. You can look at her and tell she's a tramp."

Bright red like a tomato, Young Starbucker's face was getting. "You take that back, Han! Jessica Simpson has great morals! They tricked her into wearing those skimpy clothes in The Dukes of Hazzard! You don't know what you're talking about!"

"You gotta lot to learn about women, Kid."

"Oh, and I suppose you know anthing about them?"

"Let's just say I've managed to kiss women who aren't my sister."

....Read the rest of this post here you can.

Saturday, October 15, 2005

From Palpatine's Blog: The "coming out' party

I was somewhat anxious to try out my new clothes at a social gathering, and it just so happens that Master Windu was having a party at the Jedi Temple last night. Never one to pass up an opportunity to gather some intel on the Jedi order, I agreed to attend.

I decided to wear one of my new senate suits, with my speedos underneath just in case it turned into a pool party.

I planned to arrive fashionably late (pun intended), only to find all of the usual suspects had not shown up yet. I really need to get on Mas Amedda about my scheduling. He told me that the party was to start about 1800 hours SCT (Standard Coruscant Time), so I showed up around 1900. Apparently, the party was not to begin until 2100.

continues here

Thursday, October 13, 2005

From Padmé's Blog: Another Day, Another Throw Down

I ran toward the bounty hunter and landed a roundhouse kick to his chest. (Thanks to Captain Typho for that totally cool martial arts training!) He staggered a bit, which gave me a split second to recover my blaster. I knew I was taking a chance engaging him, but I wanted to get closer, to get a good look at him.

Turns out he was a she. She stayed in the dark, despite my efforts to draw her out. She wore a helmet but appeared to be bald with very whitish skin. And she smelled totally nasty. She had that laser-whip-thing in one hand and a blaster in the other.

Suddenly, Anakin was at my side, deflecting blaster fire. Yes!


Wednesday, October 12, 2005

From General Grievous' blog: Assault on Coruscant - Part 15 (Jail Break)

The outcome of last night can be said in one short statement: Party at Palpatine's tomorrow!

It was midnight, the sky was dark, the prison was asleep, and I finished my dinner (deep fried Scurrier) four hours ago. I was casually doing a 3D crossword, when I looked out the window and saw a pair of headlights drift down, out of the sky. When the vehicle was closer my eyes flicked to the under carriage, it had four wheels! I was drawn back into reality by the sound of a familiar voice:

Palps: Hey Grievous, do us a favour and tie this around the bars.


Sunday, October 09, 2005

From Captain Typho's Blog - "Tagged and Killing Time"

Killing Time.
Killing time in hyperspace
Originally uploaded by Captain Typho.
Where: In the Naboo cruiser, somewhere in hyperspace

Feeling: Nothing.

Listening to: Nobody, thank God.

I come out of an unusually heavy sleep, feeling like I’m drowning.

It’s pitch black in my room, but I feel like the sun ought to be up by now. I reach for my comlink.

Then I remember that I lost it.

Then I remember where I am and why.


No sense trying to go back to sleep now.


Thursday, October 06, 2005

From Palps Blog: What not to wear? (Part five)

After two days of shopping, 5000 credits, a nice new pair of purple and turquoise speedos, and a memorable moment where Clinton tossed his cookies, I was ready for the next phase of my fashion makeover. Hair with Nick, and makeup with Carmindy.

Hey, what a sec. Makeup??

First I met with Nick, the hair guy.

Nick: Well Chancellor, I am not exactly sure what we can do with this hair.

Palps: What ‘exactly’ is wrong with my hair?

Continued here...

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

From Han's Blog: Dead End?

As the Twilek and I were climbing the stairs (no lift in this place, the mechanism would get clogged with the dust and sand), I started prying him for the information.
Han: Who is the job for?
Contact: Some old geezer.
Han: What does he need me for?
Contact: (eyes me sideways) I don't know.
Han: What kind of job is it?
Contact: You'll have to ask him.
Han: How will this help me find information on my father?
Contact: It's part of the job.
Han: The job you don't know anything about.
Contact: That's right...

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

From Padmé's Blog: The Bounty Hunter

I woke up in the middle of the night with Anakin on top of me. No, not like that. Psh.

Major déjà vu. This is just what happened on Coruscant. Maybe I should stop drinking so many margaritas before bed so I’m not sleeping so soundly and I might actually wake up when some bounty hunter is trying to kill me. Maybe.


Monday, October 03, 2005

From General Grievous' blog: Assault on Coruscant - Part 11

After much consideration, and listening in on official conversations, we decided to attack the Republic’s barracks. Using Zin’s hidden map:

… we planed to walk through the door, kill everyone, and walk back out again.


Big Brother: Naboo

Survivor: Tatooine